Oracle
428 oracle items tagged as team oracle
February 6, 2015 / submitted by The Oracle, United Kingdom
Q.  WHO'D LIKE TO JOIN TEAM ORACLE?

As you may know, we have a weekly feature, Team Oracle, whereby each Friday we open questions of a personal nature to all of you to answer too. Then, the following Friday, I post a selection of the best answers, alongside my own reply. In the spirit of Valentine's Day but without the Hallmark Holiday quality, this week's is a light, lovely Q.

ANYONE can join in so, if you'd like to, please email your response to the following question, in no more than 250 words, to theoracle@coldplay.com before midnight Thursday 12 February.

What's the most beautiful thing that ever happened to you? Madalina (via twitter).

Look forward to reading your replies.

The Oracle.

Please email your replies with TEAM ORACLE in the subject line to theoracle@coldplay.com
Including your twitter address may result in a follow back.



January 30, 2015 / submitted by Dani, United States of America
Q.  TEAM ORACLE QUESTION #202
For all my life, I remember I found love to be the most important thing in our lives. I even thought it was the point of life, and I do not mean it in a mate and reproduce kind of way. I literally thought the point to live was to find our soul mate. Yea, I'm a bit of a romantic. Well, I also believed to be in love with someone you had to feel certain ways. For example: be mesmerized by your partners eyes, be dazed whenever you kiss, and so on. Though, one of the biggest things I believed about true love was that if you are truly in love, you could not thing of another in a romantic way. Having that idea in my head, justified cheating on my previous partners countless times. It meant, to me, that we were not meant to be. At this moment in my, I am currently in a relationship. We entered this relationship on the first day we met in person ( I admit that it was dumb), and it has been six months from then. Now this is where the problem is. I know for a fact I am in love with him, but I must confess I looked at another in the same way. I did not cheat, and I honestly believe that I wouldn't cheat on him. The idea of cheating on him just sounds horrible to me. So I guess the question is: can it be true love even though you glance at another?

So what if you started a relationship on day one? You're still together after 6 months so something's working. Anyway, I may sound contradictory here but bear with me. It's not the same for everyone so everything I say is personal opinion, feelings or experience.
I'm a romantic but I do not believe in The One or soulmates - or rather, I think a soulmate can be any gender and not necessarily someone you're romantically involved with. I now realise that there's also nothing wrong with being single. Better than being in a relationship for the wrong reasons. I agree love is very important but there are various kinds: platonic love, maternal / paternal love etc.
Being in love feels different to loving someone.
When I am in love, I do not look at another. It's like I am wearing blinkers.
If I love someone, I may still admire others' beauty and maybe even think about them inappropriately. I think there's only harm if you want to or intend to act on those feelings.
I personally don't think there is such a thing as "harmless flirting"; if you're in a relationship, I don't think it's healthy.
I should point out that when I was very young, I cheated and although it was never uncovered, it made me reassess what I wanted from life and love. I vowed never to cheat again and never have, never would. I don't condone cheating and do not think it's ever justified. To me it's simple; if you choose to cheat, why not choose to be single instead? You can do what you want without potentially hurting anyone else. As you say, if you cheat it must mean you don't really love that person, right? Not necessarily but it isn't fair to continue. We're human and imperfect but that's not an excuse.
When you're in a relationship, there are sometimes different phases. They say the honeymoon period of the first couple of years, you're madly in love but it settles down after a while and the fireworks stop. I know people who have never felt butterflies when they look at their partner for example. It doesn't mean their love isn't real. We're not all the same.
I like my relationships to stay in the honeymoon phase rather than move into a more comfortable one. I don't think relationships should be too hard but I think effort needs to put in to keep the spark alive, as I like the magical element of intoxicating love. That said, I'm also realistic. I am lucky to have experienced long term honeymoon phases but it can (& they did) end - sometimes unexpectedly - at any time. Like most things, it may not last a lifetime. Love is a bit like a surfer looking to catch a great wave and ride it. You may get none, you may get one, or you may get many but if you get it, enjoy it while it lasts.
If you say you're in love with your boyfriend and you'd never cheat on him, there doesn't appear to be a problem. I can't help think there's something lying underneath for you to ask the question. You should sort of know the right answer for YOU. If I looked at someone else, I'd know I'm not 100% committed to the person but that doesn't mean it's the same for you or anyone else.
Over to you.

It's important to not confuse love with romanticism. True love is acceptance, respect, dedication and a true connection with one another. Our society has a way of leading us to believe that in order to be in love you need to feel and act a certain way, but that doesn't always work for everyone. I believe that when two people are meant to be together their souls will find each other and a connection will be made, that doesn't mean that it will last a lifetime, since people change and sometimes it's healthy to move on when a relationship doesn't work anymore. Only your heart can tell you if it's true love, not the mind, you can't use logic to figure this one out!. There is nothing wrong with looking at another person and finding him/her attractive, that doesn't mean that you are not in love or that you will cheat. When your heart is truly in love, there's no room for disrespect, since hurting your partner would also mean hurting your own self. Adelina.

We all have different outlooks on life and it's truly great that you see life as having a purpose and that you truly believe in wonderful things. I must admit, I'm not one with a bucketload of experience concerning love, but I will certainly do my best to help.
My first impression on reading your question was that perhaps you were not quite ready to settle down in a relationship, however I think you are. We can't hold back on things just because they are difficult or confusing, and the same can be said for this. I think you need to give yourself time to think and truly analyse your situation.
Do you know this other well? If not, I think you should give it time. There's no point rushing into it if this is the case.
Why are you feeling this way? It can be hard to pinpoint this but try your best. Do you love this other because you find them beautiful? Because you get along well? Do you have a unique chemistry? Are they supportive of you or very close in a personal sense? If you're convinced you're in love with this other because they are attractive, though you do not know them, it's probably a good idea to have patience. Think about your current relationship and if you can picture it in 5, 10, 20 years time. Best of luck. Paige.

When you go to some important event, you choose the most beautiful outfit,you put all your efforts to look and feel great. While trying the outfit,may be you like many dresses but you can't try more than one dress or shoes at the same time. Imagine yourself dressed in 2 dresses just because you like them all... It would be ridiculous,right? At the end you choose the one between many that you like because it suits you the best. That's how I find cheating. Like going on a big event in 2 beautiful dresses and shoes,but looking like a fool. If you have that romantic approach to love, go for it. I think that you can find him and feel what you wrote about, but without testing and exploring every man and chance that you get, especially not by cheating or even glancing. Go for it by being quiet and alone for awhile, meet yourself and your emotions. Although I considered love to be just what you said, I realised that love was decision in my head. I decided that I wanted to find "the one", right for me. Not that I couldn't be with or like many men, but I set a goal to find the one that suits me the best, like a right dress. First step is to know yourself and your deepest meaning, to grow your talents and wisdom, to learn how to live on your own and to have eyes wide open. Finally, there's also an interesting quote: "Dance with God, He'll let the right man to cut in." Wish you that man some day! Kamili.

Right, to start this off, I always believed that love, like many things, comes with time. Lots, of time. Being with your partner for one week and not feeling like you love them is okay and is in no way an excuse to cheat. Just like it takes time for you to love your partner, it will take time for them to love you. Maybe it won't be at the same time, but it eventually happens. Now finding other people attractive is fine, loving someone doesn't ruin your "attractive radar" but it just means only that, finding them attractive. Heck, my parents used to sit in front of the T.V and rate actors and actresses according to how attractive they find them! Its fine as long as it doesn't affect your relationship or your appreciation for one another. Take your time, love and be loyal to your partner. You can tell him that you love him, just choose the right time and conditions to tell him (eg, don't choose a time when you're fighting). I hope you all the best of luck! Love, Solaf.

You were right, Love is the most important thing in life. But not specifically romantically speaking. You have to put Love in all of your actions, towards anybody - do everything with Love and for Love.
On a relationship point of view, you definitely have soul mates but you also have friend and family soul mates. Then there are soul mates with whom you can choose to start a great romantic relationship with. But basically true love is about loving unconditionally and not asking anything from your partner - just love him/her as he/she is. Don't blame the other one when there's something wrong and try to understand him/her. Some people will definitely make you feel special sometimes, but it doesn't mean that this will be more special with that person, sometimes you're just feeling an energy connection but it doesn't mean that the person will be better for you. Get to know him/her better first. In my opinion feeling something strong and unique is essential, but you also have to really fall in love with the person, with every part of him/her and see the true wonder inside of that person. And if your relationship is really based on true unconditional love then you won't especially want to go find something more in someone else. If you don't love the person you're with truly for what he/she is, try to understand what you don't like at first or you'll find somebody that will suit you better.
Never lose your faith - true love does exist but it is not that easy, you also have your part to play.
With Love, Chloe.


I think it's important to remember that love is influenced not only by emotions within the spirit, but also by a very powerful mixture of physical brain chemicals. Our physical bodies are created to function in a way that perpetuates reproduction, so yes, you can be completely in love with someone, yet still be attracted to another. I would guess that our physical bodies weren't originally created for monogamy. Being attracted to someone other than your love is nothing to be alarmed about. It doesn't make you less in love. It makes you human. What you do with those feelings is what really matters.
I don't think that your rationale for cheating/not cheating is productive because with the chemicals at work in your brain, you would find yourself never able to be in a monogamous relationship because the brain is going to function as its created to function. Only your will can supersede its impulses to stray.
My best, Miranda.

This is a hard question, from all the points of view, but not impossible.
I have to be honest and say that I've never been in a situation like this, maybe because I've only loved once in my whole life and I don't think I'll love anyone else too soon.
Just like you, I am a romantic as well. I still dream that prince charming will come and save me and we'll live happily ever after.
Your situation is delicate, but love is the most important thing in the whole world.
Why?
Cause if there wouldn't be love, there wouldn't be anything. And now to answer your question, no, I don't think you love your lover less if you look at others. We are allowed to look, but look from a certain distance. Now, I don't know your loved one, but I think you should both talk about this. Honesty comes first in a relationship and it should always be first thing to talk about. And if you love each other, then you'll accept each other no matter what, cause that's love, loving someone without any conditions.
From your words I can see that you love your lover dearly and that's beautiful and I wish you to be happy and I really hope I helped!!
Lots of love from Romania!!
Madalina.


The advice I have for you is short, sweet and to the point.
"If you love two people at the same time, choose the second, because if you really loved the first one you wouldn't have fallen for the second." Johnny Depp.
Take this as you wish
Greetings from United Kingdom
Gene.

There's nothing wrong with being a romantic. I agree with you that love is an important aspect of our lives, but love comes in many shapes and forms. Some people fall in love instantly and feel all those feelings you described, others may need more time for their love to grow. When you've just started a relationship with someone you're in love and you feel dazed and mesmerised, but after a while these feelings get less intense and you'll reach a new phase in your relationship. That doesn't mean you don't love your partner anymore though, it just means you've learned to love him/her in a different and more permanent way. Not under any circumstances do I believe its alright to cheat on your partner. If you fall in love with someone else, thats fine, but first end things with your current partner before moving on. Have you ever seen how men and women, even when they're married, sometimes stare at an attractive man/woman when he/she walks by? There's absolutely nothing wrong about looking at someone else and acknowledging you feel attracted towards this person and/or appreciate their looks. But that doesn't mean you should act on those feelings or are better off starting a relationship with that person.So yes, it can still be (true) love. Good luck! Amanda.

Thanks to all those who replied to this week's question. Remember, Team Oracle is open to anyone so if you fancy replying, click to read this week's, and send us your answer.



January 30, 2015 / submitted by The Oracle, United Kingdom
Q.  WHO'D LIKE TO JOIN TEAM ORACLE?

As you may know, we have a weekly feature, Team Oracle, whereby each Friday we open questions of a personal nature to all of you to answer too. Then, the following Friday, I post a selection of the best answers, alongside my own reply.

ANYONE can join in so, if you'd like to, please email your response to the following question, in no more than 250 words, to theoracle@coldplay.com before midnight Thursday 5 February.

My girlfriend has broken up with me. Coldplay's music was always very special for our relationship. As I won't stop fighting for her, I am willing to do everything for us. As she keeps on blocking me, I need to do something special for her to show her that I really need her.
Thanking you so much in advance!
Michael, UK.


Look forward to reading your replies.

The Oracle.

Please email your replies with TEAM ORACLE in the subject line to theoracle@coldplay.com
Including your twitter address may result in a follow back.



January 26, 2015 / submitted by Victoria, Lithuania
Q.  Hello! Can you share your best moments of being Oracle?

I have to say hand on my heart that some of the amazing responses from people who submit to Team Oracle really are special. To add to that, when someone writes to say thank you for the advice that people have taken the time to write is also pretty heartwarming.


January 22, 2015 / submitted by Amber, United Kingdom
Q.  TEAM ORACLE QUESTION #201
I and my creative endeavors have been rejected quite a bit throughout my life and I've had trouble moving on from the rejection. I'm wondering how to keep believing in myself, despite the opposition? How do I stay confident?

One thing I do know for sure is this: as long as you believe in yourself, it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks.
For once you may be relieved to know I do know what rejection feels like and have faced it many, many times. The first time was the hardest. I can't pinpoint when it eventually got easier, I only know it did but I remember it took a while. I'm not sure it does get easier for everyone but I do believe that it can & it's something you can get a handle on and use positively.
When someone rejects you or your efforts, it's only that one person's opinion. Ok, so it may turn out to be a shared opinion by more than one (hundreds, thousands...) but what's important is to rise above it and take it on the chin.
I'm quite sure you don't love every piece of music, every work of art, every photograph, every poem, every story, every fill, every book, every television show, every theatrical performance etc. You get the idea. It's all subjective. We're all different and have different tastes - one man's meat is another man's poison, one man's trash is another man's treasure. There are plenty of idioms but essentially I'm saying accept the criticism, perhaps even ask for constructive feedback and move on. You can sometimes learn from these experiences to improve and go forward.
I shall leave you with my all time favourite quotes from one of my (fictional) heros, Rocky Balboa.
"The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard you hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now if you know what you're worth then go out and get what you're worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that ain't you! You're better than that!"
Over to you.

We all experience some form of rejection in our lives, and this rejection is made all the more painful when it relates to things we are passionate about. The thing however, with artistic endeavours, is that it happens just as frequently as other fields, but is always more personal. Art is almost purely based on opinion and interpretation. Any forms at creativity are rarely based on fact, contraire to things such as a scientific theory, which can be rejected because it is wrong, or accepted because it is right. Art is different. There is no wrong, which means those that are accepted are chosen on preference or speciality. My advice? Get yourself out there. Don't specifically aim to be accepted by particular groups, because it wont happen that way. But there is always going to be someone out there who loves your work, work with that and see where it takes you. Best of luck. Paige.

Okay, as much as I don't like critics and rejection, I know that being rejected happens to everyone. Yes, everyone. Most of the greatest people in their trade have been rejected time and time again, even Coldplay have been put down, but they strived and look at them now! If you have talent, it will never leave you. You will be put down many times and you will be rejected but when you make it in the end, everything will be worth it. Basically, rejection isn't as bad as it sounds. Love, Solaf.

Life doesn't always go the way we plan and rejection is a major part of it. Life wouldn't be worthy if you get what you want easily, think about it and you will realize that the most enjoyable things are those you did extra effort for. If everyone surrender for rejection no one would ever have done anything at all. You should always do your best and be ready to do it again and again till you finally get results. Never give up, always trust in yourself and believe that you can make difference to the world, then you will never fail.
Hope you could achieve whatever you dream of...
Greetings from Egypt, Dalia.


I would just like to say two things 'Positive Thinking' & 'Belief'. Trust me this two things just makes life more easy
1)Lance Armstrong - Had cancer, manned up, got over it and won the Tour de France again. (*Oracle: er...).
2) The Wright Brothers - built and flew the first plane even though everyone said it wasn't possible
3) Sylvester Stallone - Rejected many times for his screenplay writings, got financially broke and could barely feed his family, hocked his wife jewellery, sold his own pet but still didn't give up and fought his way through the success.
Why do you think what made them overcome all this difficulties and achieve success, that was there belief in themselves and their work.
They always thought they are the great people and soon they did proved themselves.
Trust me just be 'positive' & never loose 'hope'. Shreyas.

I have to say that your question got me really emotional. The reason is that I've been rejected too throughout my short 17 years, and I don't say this just to be said, I say it because you have to know that you are not alone and that there are many people fighting with rejection all over the world.
I'll tell you what I used to do 2 years ago when I was rejected, I used to cry myself to sleep every night and be sad. Now, after 2 years, after meeting amazing people from thousands of miles away, people that believe in me, I feel more confident and happy, even though that fear is still there.
But you should never let fear take control, you just have to accept it as a part of yourself because that's what fear is, a part of our soul, our personality.
The thing is, you should never let yourself destroyed by anyone, cause what you think of yourself is more important than what others think, as long as you believe and as long as the ones you care about and they care about you believe, you are unstoppable and only the sky is the limit, that beautiful sky full of stars.
The only truth you have to know is that if you believe with all your heart and soul and spirit, than it has to be real and right.
I hope I helped! Lots of love from Romania! Madalina.


"Fall down seven times, stand up eight", I'm not sure who said it but this is a good sentence to keep in mind. Every successful person in the world has had countless of setbacks and rejections before they finally made it to where they are today. Musicians, best-selling authors, actors, CEO's, everyone. I'm not sure what kind of 'creative endeavors' you are referring to, so it's hard to give you any specific advice. The one thing I know for sure is to never give up. I know its hard to move on and to think positive when you've been rejected many times, but don't give up on your dreams. Also try to find out why your creative endeavors are being rejected, ask for feedback from friends, family and strangers. It might take months or it might take years and unfortunately for some people it never happens at all, but keep on trying and hopefully one day your creativity will be recognized! Good luck, Amanda.

I would like to help you but from time to time I feel the same in many ways. I live in reserved and closed society (country) where creativity, arts, humanity and emotions often are neglected and blocked. I dream about many things and about living my deepest self,but there are many obstacles. I understand you,so what I can tell from my experience is that we should always look on the darker and brighter side of life. It could be better but it could be worse. Always hope and believe in the better side. Do whatever you can do, be yourself as much as you can be and forgive. Be satisfied and grateful for the smallest things and bigger ones will come. If you search you will always find some way or some person. Obstacles also build your creativity by forcing you to find solutions and ways. We are all connected with heart, love and Coldplay. Remember:"Sometimes the stars decide to reflect in the puddles in the dirt." Love,Kamili.

I think that rejection is hard for everyone to deal with. Some deal with it better than others. I hate rejection too. My mom was an artist and a designer. She faced a lot of rejection, but she kept on designing and creating beautiful things. She ended up designing a line a crystal glassware that is precious to me. She designed gift wrap paper for a major company, and I am proud every time I see it.
She started hand painting needlepoint canvases, that I stitched her samples. Then, she discovered beads! She loved beads because there were so many colors to put together and play with. She made beautiful jewelry that people wanted to buy when she wore it out shopping.
We lost my mom 5 years ago, and I can't tell you how many people said that she was making certain colored items for them! I knew better. She was finally designing and making things for herself! I didn't give anything that she made to anyone because it's all I have of her. My mom was a success because of her perseverance. When she faced rejection, she moved on and came up with new ideas. I bet that Coldplay faced rejection when they were first starting out, but they kept on writing and playing new songs. They certainly didn't start out as the top band that they are today. The only advice that I have for you is to keep trying and move past the rejection. Believe in yourself. Cat.

Sorry to hear your frustration over the rejections you have been dealt in your life.
Throughout history many creative geniuses have been negatively criticized and rejected. Walt Disney, Albert Einstein, Bill Gates, Edgar Allan Poe, Nikola Tesla are just a few luminaries to have suffered much rejection and many failures. I suggest you research their lives and others who have been ostracized for their creative endeavors. They never gave up; they couldn't! Creativity is a gift that flowed in their blood, forming the core of their souls. They couldn't stop going forward with creating their chosen art, it's the air they breathed. I have no doubt you are the same. Please realize that most people don't possess or haven't developed great creative minds, so they can be callous and numb to your endeavors. Continue your art form with zealous passion for YOU, and I guarantee others will take notice. It will be hard for your spirit, I know, and life seems to be all about nothing else but rejection for the most part, but you can use that hurt to fuel your creativity, turning something ugly like rejection into stellar beauty for all to enjoy. There's only one YOU. Never, never,never give up.
Have a Super Sparkling Day! S.E. Barnett


When I read your question I remembered two stories I've heard recently.
The first one is a little bit fictional and is about a man who was asked to present a project. When he finished and sent it to his boss the only answer he got was "check it again" without any explanation. And he did so, he read his own work and changed some things he thought could improve it. He sent it to his boss again and the answer he got again was "check it again". He re-read it and changed some more things but he got the same answer. After the fifth time he sent it to his boss, he finally got the answer he wanted to hear "it is a great project".
The second story is real! There is a mexican astronaut who wanted to work in the NASA. He presented his project and applied for the job twelve times before to get it.
What I learnt was to never give up and find ways to improve what you've done even if it was good. There are always ways to be better. And if you feel you're run out of ideas don't worry to much just make some other things like answering word searches, playing some computer games, watching some videos. After 5 minutes you'll see everything from another perspective. There is always a solution but we won't find them if we get stressed. Best wishes, Isabel.

Thanks to all those who replied to this week's milestone 200th question. Remember, Team Oracle is open to anyone so if you fancy replying, click to read this week's, and send us your answer.



January 22, 2015 / submitted by The Oracle, United Kingdom
Q.  WHO'D LIKE TO JOIN TEAM ORACLE?

As you may know, we have a weekly feature, Team Oracle, whereby each Friday we open questions of a personal nature to all of you to answer too. Then, the following Friday, I post a selection of the best answers, alongside my own reply.

ANYONE can join in so, if you'd like to, please email your response to the following question, in no more than 250 words, to theoracle@coldplay.com before midnight Thursday 29 January.

For all my life, I remember I found love to be the most important thing in our lives. I even thought it was the point of life, and I do not mean it in a mate and reproduce kind of way. I literally thought the point to live was to find our soul mate. Yea, I'm a bit of a romantic. Well, I also believed to be in love with someone you had to feel certain ways. For example: be mesmerized by your partners eyes, be dazed whenever you kiss, and so on. Though, one of the biggest things I believed about true love was that if you are truly in love, you could not thing of another in a romantic way. Having that idea in my head, justified cheating on my previous partners countless times. It meant, to me, that we were not meant to be. At this moment in my, I am currently in a relationship. We entered this relationship on the first day we met in person ( I admit that it was dumb), and it has been six months from then. Now this is where the problem is. I know for a fact I am in love with him, but I must confess I looked at another in the same way. I did not cheat, and I honestly believe that I wouldn't cheat on him. The idea of cheating on him just sounds horrible to me. So I guess the question is: can it be true love even though you glance at another? Dani. USA.

Look forward to reading your replies.

The Oracle.

Please email your replies with TEAM ORACLE in the subject line to theoracle@coldplay.com
Including your twitter address may result in a follow back.



January 16, 2015 / submitted by Anonymous, United Kingdom
Q.  TEAM ORACLE QUESTION #200
I am currently suffering with depression. Often when I am going through a tough spot I don't know who to turn to and often wish I had some sort of chat room to access. Could you help me to find a website in which this would be possible? Thank you.

I never read other Team Oracle replies until I have written my answer so I don't know if anyone has suggested any but I'd feel reluctant to recommend forums or online chat rooms that I haven't got first-hand experience of, even if I researched the topic extensively.
I'm sure there are a plethora of online communities that would probably give you what you seek but that's something you'd have to try and see what works for you.
I don't know what your local area is like but where I live, you can find similar information via community notice boards, local libraries and even in shop windows.
Personally, I propose you initially speak with your doctor as they may be able to offer you counselling through the practice. They may also know of support groups. I know speaking face to face is hard but it's another option.
Whatever you do, you got in touch here so I know you can take the next step.
I wish you luck.

I know exactly how you feel because this is the kind of stuff I had to go through before my miraculous recovery, which to this day leaves me baffled (thanks Coldplay). Anyhow, I don't know many chatrooms that are actually beneficial because most of them just depress you more, and I won't even begin to talk about seeking medical attention, because I know how much it used to get on my nerves when someone spoke of this. If you really need to talk to someone, I am always here to offer a helping hand and a shoulder to cry on. You can always email me if you feel like it at (*EDIT: Anon, please contact me for Solaf's email address if you want it). Lots of love, Solaf.

Firstly I would like to say that you should seek for professional help and talk to your family and close people. I hope you did it or you'll do it soon. If you feel depressed you should check if it is serious before it becomes too serious.
I suggest you to do sports to energize and empower your body and mind.
I found some chatrooms, I hope it helps you: here, here and here.
My e-mail is: (*EDIT: Again, please contact me for Kamili's email address) if you want to contact me.
I wish you the best and often remember these lyrics:
"In the darkness, before the dawn, in the darkness, before the dawn, leave a light, a light on, leave a light, a light on."
Love, Kamili.

Depression has gotten a bad rap, and there's no shame if you suffer from it. I also suffer from it, and I have to take medicine for it. Meds have a bad rap and shouldn't because they can and do help.
I've discovered that when I really feel down and depressed, I'm really anxious and worried about something. Anxiety and depression tend to go together.
I'm not fond of chat rooms because you don't know the people in them. This is why I love Twitter and Coldplay. If you follow the nice people on Twitter, they are kind enough to ask about you and protect you from bullies, who are on there. I love to listen to many of Coldplay's songs but O is my go to song when I am stressed out.
I don't chat with my friends all of the time on Twitter which is a sign that I'm down and stressed out. People know me well enough to ask if I'm ok. You can also send direct messages to people that no one else sees. It's not perfect but it works for me. Music also helps me a lot.
There is no reason to feel embarrassed about depression and anxiety. It happens to so many of us. I have talked many people out of suicide. You were put here for a reason, and you matter to many people who would be lost without you. I wish you luck and love because I know how you feel.
Sincerely, Cat


I understand exactly what you are going through. I also suffer from depression and often feel alone and like I have nobody to talk to. I have found some comfort in discussing my issues with friends that I have met through both Twitter and Instagram. I would love to help you out and even make a new friend so please feel free to email me at (*EDIT: Again, please contact me for Tamara's email address). I would love to talk to you and we could try to help each other out. Hope the Oracle replies help you out pal.
Tamara.

I know what you feel and I know how you feel because I'm suffering of depression for like 3 years now.
It's hard to hide it because sometimes you have mask after mask to cover the real you. There are many places where you can find consolation, I often find mine on Instagram or on Tumblr. I think you know about the community that is on Tumblr, people that have no idea who you are or how you look like help you and support you. Sometimes people that you'll probably never see face to face deserve a place in your heart.
And about depression, well it's hard, but I want you to be strong and never give up.
If life would be easy, we wouldn't do it right. Someone, I don't know who, I like to believe it's God, but everyone with his or her beliefs, made us. That person brought us here for a reason, that reason can be a great one, like to be rock stars or maybe just to have a family and live happily ever after.
Life is a gift that was given to you and you have to turn it into the most beautiful and extraordinary experience and to live long and to be happy and to love with all your heart.
I'll make a deal with you, if you promise me to fight, I'll do the same, because together we are stronger than anything!!
Remember that you are not alone and that we are always here for you and we will always be!
Love from Romania! Madalina.


I read your question and could instantly relate to it. When I went through severe depression last spring, I wanted to retreat from everyone and everything I knew loved or cared about. I really feel the need to caution against a chat room. While you may feel more comfortable talking online to a stranger, please consider this, depression messes with our thought process. Everything is huge, nothing is insignificant and in that state of mind, we can easily be driven further and deeper into sorrow by a misguided thought. It is easy to misread tones and inflections in a chat room.
A better choice may be a helpline or a mental health professional who will help you understand what led to this and keep you safe as you come out of it. If a peer chat room is what you are still looking for exercise caution and find one you feel safest in, because there are so many. Maybe look for one associated with a mental health group or professionals. This is not an arena for amateurs. Depression is serious. It has many causes and may need a variety of treatments. You have done the brave first step to admit you have a problem. I wish you every success as you deal with this, take care, Laurie.

First of all - it's a good thing you're trying to reach out, rather than keeping all the difficult stuff to yourself. It shows you want to get through this hard time - which is an important precondition. I can relate to the feeling of wanting to talk to someone, but not knowing who to turn to. The thing is - there are so many amazing, helpful people and organizations in this world, you just have to know where to find them. Which, sadly, often isn't easy. There's a UK-based charity I haven't contacted myself (among other things because I'm from Germany and I don't know if their service is for non-UK-citizens), but a friend of mine told me about them. It is called Samaritans - samaritans.org. You can call them 24/7, or write an e-mail, or visit them at one of their branches. They are lending a sympathetic ear to anyone who contacts them, who's struggling with some kind of trouble - including those with mental health issues. The people there are no psychologists, though (most of them are volunteers, I think) - but I hope you already have a therapist anyway?! They 'just' listen and try to help you cope with the situation. As I said, I don't have personal experience with Samaritans, but they helped a friend, and the things they write on their website sound very good, so maybe it's worth giving it a try. All the best & positive vibes :) Katharina.

Thanks to all those who replied to this week's milestone 200th question. Remember, Team Oracle is open to anyone so if you fancy replying, click to read this week's, and send us your answer.



January 16, 2015 / submitted by The Oracle, United Kingdom
Q.  WHO'D LIKE TO JOIN TEAM ORACLE?

As you may know, we have a weekly feature, Team Oracle, whereby each Friday we open questions of a personal nature to all of you to answer too. Then, the following Friday, I post a selection of the best answers, alongside my own reply.

ANYONE can join in so, if you'd like to, please email your response to the following question, in no more than 250 words, to theoracle@coldplay.com before midnight Thursday 22 January.

I and my creative endeavors have been rejected quite a bit throughout my life and I've had trouble moving on from the rejection. I'm wondering how to keep believing in myself, despite the opposition? How do I stay confident? Amber.

Look forward to reading your replies.

The Oracle.

Please email your replies with TEAM ORACLE in the subject line to theoracle@coldplay.com
Including your twitter address may result in a follow back.



January 9, 2015 / submitted by Joel, United States of America
Q.  TEAM ORACLE QUESTION #199
I'm in a very difficult position being seniors in high school - we are almost going into the real world. I am honestly scared, I know what I want to do but it's relying on one thing and if I don't make it I'm scared I'm not gonna be able to do anything.
Have you ever felt like this if so how did you deal with it?

Firstly, stop worrying - that won't help you. Secondly, you're not alone - there are thousands of people who share similar thoughts at this milestone junction of your life. Thirdly, the fact you know what you want to do at this stage is a very good thing.

It's understandable that you feel apprehension about moving from the comfort zone of school to the next phase. You probably felt nervous on your first day of school. It's natural for us to feel nervous when we start something new.
I can honestly say I haven't really felt like this. I tend to take risks and believe they will come to fruition. If they don't, so what? If I tried & failed, I would give something else a go. There's no guarantee you'll love the path you have chosen. I had an entirely different career 20 years ago. I decided it wasn't for me and made the change. Life's one big adventure and it'd be dull if predictable.
Embrace the challenges and tackle them head on but only when they present themselves. Remember, there is absolutely no point worrying about something that has happened and may never happen. It's a total waste of time and energy and may attract negative things.
Keep positive and try your hardest in the field you have chosen. It's ok to fail. Failing is usually the start of great success.
Over to you.

I'm a senior in college and I have to admit that I'm scared of entering the real world too. I'm afraid of making mistakes, which is something that will inevitably happen as I'm a human being.
My first advice: Be aware of your strengths and weaknesses, and stop being afraid of failure. You have to be aware of your own skills, of your talents, and trust them. Then work hard to achieve your goals. When you start doubting your skills or your own potential, you become an obstacle for yourself. The fear of failure is something that will paralyse you and stop you from developing your potential, from showing the world what you can do and from learning from your own mistakes. That's something I can tell based on my own experience.
My second advice: If things don't turn out the way you wanted, it doesn't mean you are a failure or that you won't eventually get to the place you want to be in. Sometimes things don't turn out the way we want in a specific moment, but most of the time it's just what we need so we can learn some valuable lessons. Don't ever think everything is lost just because you didn't have success at the first try. You have to keep in mind there's not only one way to get to a certain place.
So don't panic. Work hard. Trust yourself (even though you're scared and full of doubts). And always have faith. Noelia, Argentina.


All what I am about to say can be summarised into three words- go for it. But in further detail, I would like to tell you that you are so young and life awaits. You shouldn't be scared to do things because the only thing you will ever be regretting is missed opportunities. Sure you can mess up, once, twice, even several times but that's life's way of teaching you how to do it right. Always go after what you want and put blood and tears into everything you're passionate about because my parents made the mistake of not seizing opportunities given to them and now four have to suffer because of decisions of two. Joel please do not give up, I know you're able and always will be. Love, Solaf.

As a Freshman in college, I know exactly how you feel because I was just there myself. I was worried sick about what would happen after high school. I was terrified of "the real world" and if I'd make it to where I wanted to go. The world outside of high school seemed frightening and I was horrified of what was to come.

The frightening world that I had been told of and had scared myself into believing didn't even exist. The real world and college were not even close to how scary I had imagined, and as a matter of fact, they were better than high school! Yes, there are responsibilities that you aren't used to having and it's not easy, but it's not terrifying. You have more independence and people treat you like an adult. It's wonderful.
As for worrying about if you'll make it, don't burden yourself with the fear of failing. Fight for what you want to achieve, seek help, and do your very best. Picture yourself succeeding. Head to the light. If you truly work at it, you'll make it. Even if you don't, you went down fighting (and it may be a sign that perhaps your true path lies elsewhere). I was scared of losing, too, and now I've been accepted on a research abroad project and I'm doing what I want to do.
Seek opportunities and work hard wherever you go and you will accomplish your dreams. Don't lose hope. Brooke.


Happy New Year, Joel! What a wonderful start!
The fact that you've made the choice to take the step of sharing your fears with us, just goes to show how very brave you truly are.
In taking this step, you've already broken down walls of what tried to fence you in... so, BRAVO, BRAVO, BRAVE-O!
You're not alone in experiencing trepidation about growing up and 'making a mark' in the world... but by being the only 'you' on the planet, you will always make indellible marks. Now your email will help others. I'd say that's a beautifully powerful and visual Joel-shaped impression.
Congratulations on identifying an element to fulfilling your dream!
I've learnt (and am still learning) that there are usually lots, and your unique journey actually relies on a combination of them... which is great, because with collaboration, the pressure lessens, and precious lessons unfold.
In my life, fear has been tied up with expectation, especially my own, constructed ideas.
Things changed when I sat down with my dream/s and, literally, mapped as many things associated with the route/s, as possible.
It was fun to do and exhilirating to see what my life could (and continues to) be... I hung it on my wall for focus and inspiration!
So, I encourage you to take that heart, filled with passion, guts and determination for your mission and I'd like to add my faith in you, to the mix.
Yours, in total belief in you, Heart Not Garment. x

My friend Joel I would like to tell you that what you are feeling is every grownup's problem. You know I faced the same problem few years ago, as I have always wanted to be a doctor and I really didn't knew what to do if i couldn't join the Med school. But you know what, I found out it is not the end of the world if I couldn't, You just have to be flexible and keep up with whatever life offers you. Haven't you ever thought that what you want to do may not be the best thing for you and life may carry something much better for you !! You might find yourself to be the most successful guy in another field you have never thought of. Life is frightful and if you didn't feel frightened then you are doing something wrong. Welcome to real life, it is so scary but you are going to love it.
Dalia, Egypt.


"Life is what you make it." It's funny how five words have such a meaning. If it was not for these words, I would be close to dead. It is up to you to change yourself. To become what you desire. I was witness to my best friend trying to commit suicide. As a result, I have suffered from post traumatic stress. I've lost my best friends. A year of my life has been screwed up. Without Coldplay's music, I don't know where I would be. What I'm trying to say is, do not let ANYTHING ruin what YOU want. You are the person standing in the way. You can do whatever you want to. You know why? "Cause you're a Sky Full of Stars."
If it helped me, it will help you. Cliona.

I've had exactly the same situation and what's the worst, my parents were against my choice and my decision. But I was determined to do it and I put in my best effort,so I succeeded. If you work for it 24 hours a day, you'll probably make it, but if you don't, you can wait for it until next year. At least you know what you really want and be happy because of that. Many people don't have their real passion and choice, they just do it by case or because of money. I know people that tried 3-6 times before they got in to some college/profession they like. Give yourself time and patience but do everything you can. For me the most important is to do over my maximum, then I'm less worried about the result because I know I couldn't do more. Also consider similar professions for a case that you don't make it. I'm sure there are a lot of opportunities in USA. I really know how's to want just one thing and nothing else, but now I see that there are also other things that I could do and study. Just try to be open and take wide point of view.
I think that the most important thing is to know what your passion is, you'll always live it in your heart and find a way to do it in your life. Good luck, Kamili.


You are about to find out that life can be very interesting when you become an adult. I thought that I had everything figured out when I started college, and little did I know how different my life would be. I met and married the love of my life when I was in the college band. I was quite young. Luckily, he was graduating as an engineer.
I was able to go back to college and eventually got a nursing degree that I really didn't use because I had a set of twins. I stayed at home with them; however, my degree wasn't wasted because I used it to take care of them and other sick family members.
I would say that the most important thing that I learned about life is that you have to be flexible and change with each situation. I have had other jobs that I loved more than I did nursing. I have to be flexible with twins because they come first. Life is a journey, and you just have to follow it. Sometimes, you end up on paths that take you to totally different places than you thought that you'd be.
So, quit worrying and follow the path that you are supposed to take. You can do it.
Sincerely, Cat.

I hope the one thing you're counting on for plans, isn't measured by the moment. People start post high school dreams throughout their life. AmeriCorps volunteering caregiving or blogging can give you respite, and time to prepare further recommendations of your qualities and work habits. These usually lead to grant opportunities, including new outlooks of opportunity. Following work time or volunteering you might want to look into an Outward Bound program or Sierra club expedition. When you narrow down your passions, you may may find that there will be more supporters than ever realized. Please calm your anxiety and know there are people who need to be cared for as well, and some caring for others like you is what they do best! Susan

I know you're scared, I am too. I have one year and a half til I finish highschool and I've already started to freak out.
Yes, I am scared of what comes next, I'm scared of being grown up, I am scared of this world.
But I'll tell you a secret, fear makes us all superheroes. Yes, it's true, fear is not only a weakness, it is also a superpower that can make you run faster, that can make you smarter and impossible, but impossible not in a bad way, but in a good way. Life is hard and complicated and twisted, trust me I know from my experience even though I'm only 17, but when something ends, like highschool in our cases, it is not the end, it's the start of something new, something complicated as life itself, something impossibly impossible.
Please remember these words when you'll feel that fear again and turn yourself into a superhero, because a superhero is the one that can change the world for real and forever.
I hope my answer helped. Love from Romania!!
Madalina.

Everyone goes through rough patches in which they are confused about the future and where life will take them. As a current freshman in college, I was in your same predicament a year ago, and I can tell you firsthand that although it may seem like there is no hope, it gets so much better.
I applied to college as a pre-med student; however after taking science classes, I realized that I simply was not designed to become a doctor. We all have a calling in life and by exploring different subject areas, we can find our true passion. For example, by simply enrolling in an introductory psychology class on a whim, I was able to discover my fate.
There are billions of job opportunities in the world and there is something for everyone. You may have your heart set on one specific thing now, but think about all the opportunities you are losing out on by not even trying to explore other options. Don't let anyone tell you what or who you should be. Follow your own path and do what you truly love.
Being nervous about approaching 'the real world" is not only normal, but also healthy. It shows that you have drive, a determination that will make you successful, no matter where life takes you. Adulthood is a roller coaster, but everything always works out the way it should be. Keep your head up, think positively, and don't let anything get in the way of your goals.
Much love, Ashley from New York.


My mom always told me to 'never bet on just one horse' it's a Dutch saying which doesn't really translate well into English (* It does! The Oracle). But what it means is that you should not let important events in your life depend on just one thing. Have faith in yourself and trust that you will achieve your goal/dream, but also make sure you have other options available to you in case you don't. A back-up plan of sorts. I'm sure that if you really think about it and stop focusing on telling yourself that you won't be able to do anything if you don't 'make' whatever 'it' is, you'll find new things you haven't thought of before that you are good at and will make you equally happy. I always wanted to become an event manager, but it turned out I couldn't pass the obligatory mathematics assessment. For a while I was devastated of course. I was lost and decided to ask help from a career advisor. It turned out it was way easier than I thought to find other things I'm good at and enjoy doing. After only 3 meetings I found a completely different study that I wanted to follow. I'm in my final year now and I'm still happy with my decision, no regrets whatsoever. Many ways lead to Rome, don't be scared just wait and see were life leads you. Amanda.

I do know that feeling. The leap from the home nest of youth to actually having to participate as an autonomous adult is a big one. Trepidation is normal - plan on encountering it many more times in your life. Best thing to do is not let the daunting prospect of what lays ahead cripple you. Let it motivate you to action. I'm pretty sure I recall Chris saying in an interview that he was taught it helps to take the butterflies before a performance and imagine it as a fire burning in your belly. That's good advice. It changes the energy from chaotic to grounded, channeled & incorporated. Take the "Whoa!" with the 'What ifs?" and channel it into "Let's do this." Though in the end one's life will have taken a singular long and winding road, each step is made up of one decision plucked out of a set of options at one point in time while traveling the Path of Life. Life is a Labyrinth and the destination is always the Center. It's impossible to have the future sorted now, or any time. I recommend you learn everything you can about a subject that intrigues you, in or out of school. It won't bore you; quite the opposite. Your research will inspire ideas which you can then bring into reality. Do it well & eventually you will be a well-seasoned person of specialized interests that people will seek out for your skills.
Fly, Branwen.


I feel your pain Joel, I just finished high school in October and it really is scary going out into the real world! Just keep in mind that your dreams don't have an expiration date, you have your whole life to achieve them! You might have to start out small, and sometimes it may feel like you're getting no where, but you'll get there in the end. You just have to work hard for it, and remember opportunities won't fall into your lap! Thinking about the future that way, makes it a whole lot less terrifying for me anyway! Sam.

You have to believe in yourself, you have to believe in your dreams. If this is what you want to do, just go for it and have faith in it and in the fact that it is possible, because it is. Anything is possible - this is really true. If you believe that it will happen, then it will happen. Never doubt it. Be positive no matter what and if some people try to discourage you, believe in that even more. If you think positive, positive things will get to you. Always keep that in mind. Anything is possible, you just have to believe.
Sending you Love. You'll get through that, don't worry.
Chloe.


I really do get where you're coming from, Joel. I, too, have absolutely no idea what I want to do in the future, and you can feel pressurised to decide before you feel like you're ready. But, the thing is, you don't have to decide. As long as go down the route of something you enjoy, everything will fall into place. I also believe in having faith in your future self. As Chris himself once said, everything that is happening to you is supposed to be happening to you, so just relax. Amanda.

Thanks to all those who replied to this week's question. Remember, Team Oracle is open to anyone so if you fancy replying, click to read this week's, and send us your answer.



January 9, 2015 / submitted by The Oracle, United Kingdom
Q.  WHO'D LIKE TO JOIN TEAM ORACLE?

As you may know, we have a weekly feature, Team Oracle, whereby each Friday we open questions of a personal nature to all of you to answer too. Then, the following Friday, I post a selection of the best answers, alongside my own reply.

ANYONE can join in so, if you'd like to, please email your response to the following question, in no more than 250 words, to theoracle@coldplay.com before midnight Thursday 15 January.

I am currently suffering with depression. Often when I am going through a tough spot I don't know who to turn to and often wish I had some sort of chat room to access. Could you help me to find a website in which this would be possible? Thank you. Anonymous, UK.

Look forward to reading your replies.

The Oracle.

Please email your replies with TEAM ORACLE in the subject line to theoracle@coldplay.com
Including your twitter address may result in a follow back.



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